Inanimate Objects Should Smell Manly, Too.
For far too long, we Beasts have kept the Beast Blue™ scent to ourselves. In bar soap, ball & body powder, hair gel and other fine unguents and liniments, we’ve anointed ourselves with notes of Juniper, Citrus, Eucalyptus and a hint of Musk of the Beast.
But why shouldn’t nonhuman objects share in our crisp, fresh scent? We believe funky shoes, musty lockers, rank gym bags and other malodorous spaces should benefit from Tame the Beast’s advanced de-stinkifying technology. Introducing Beast Balls™, deodorizing balls infused with Beast Blue scent. Imbue your possessions with the comforting aroma of 100% nontoxic masculinity.
Your golf bag could smell like that night you and your dad stayed up talking on the front porch until midnight. Your commute could remind you of the time your big brother taught you to shave. Your closet could emanate the optimism and vast potential of a post-college road trip to Yellowstone.
We may be exaggerating slightly. Look, Beast Balls will make your stuff smell good, and each pair comes with our sincere wishes for some good manly memories. Let’s leave it at that.