The Guide to Men's Down-There Care

The Complete Guide to Caring for Boxer Goblins

Listen, buddy, we came here to chew gum and take care of nutts, and we’re all out of gum.

The boys need all the help they can get—they steam up pants, stick to thighs, get squashed and chafed and hardly ever get to swing freely around in the cool night air. (Maybe that old guy blow-drying his sack in the locker room was onto something, come to think of it.)

But at Tame the Beast, our products really shine where the sun… don’t. In fact, we have so many options for pampering your plums that we thought you might like a little cheat sheet about what to use, when:

Nutt Butter Original

 

Tingle Factor: light

Use: anti-chafing, cooling, softening, moisturizing

Scent: eucalyptus musk

Key Ingredients: jojoba, shea, cocoa, eucalyptus, vitamin E

Mission Statement: "Reward yourself for being an adult."

Nutt Butter Blue

 

Tingle Factor: medium

Use: anti-chafing, cooling, softening, absorbing moisture

Scent: Beast Blue™

Key Ingredients: tapioca, corn starch, organic aloe, oats, vitamin E

Mission Statement: "Banish the batwing, boys."

Nutt Butter Extreme

Tingle Factor: high to extreme. 69,000 BTUs (Beast Tingle Units).

Use: anti-chafing, awakening, levitating when you sit criss-cross-applesauce

Scent: menthol eucalyptus musk

Key Ingredients: cocoa, eucalyptus, and lots of menthol

Mission Statement: "Aaa-OOOO-ga!”

Nutt Butter Edibles

Tingle Factor: light to medium (varies by flavor)

Use: affectionate sharing

Flavors: Peppermintini, Aloe Fresca, Vanilla Manuka Honey

Key Ingredients: organic food-grade aloe and flavor

Mission Statement: "Put the 'man' in 'romance'—but stay pH-balanced to play nicely with anyone’s Down There."

Bonus: Ball & Body Powder

Tingle Factor: light to medium

Use: drying, cooling

Scent: Beast Blue™

Key Ingredients: talc-free with corn starch, green tea, menthol, cucumber, hemp

Mission Statement: “Pardon me while I powder my bros.”

See the full suite of Down-There Care here.